Thank for the well wishes

The hysteroscopy went well. He did find something and took a biopsy. He should have the results later this week or next week. He didn't seem concerned and if it is anything it can be treated with antibiotics. So right now I'm not too concerned (or should I be???). I'm a little crampy today but nothing bad. I haven't taken any of the pain meds he prescribed. TMI alert- Can't wear tampons, have inter.course for 2 weeks or take hot baths. That's not a problem, I only take showers and nothing against pads, they just aren't for me. So right now I feel like I'm suffering.

I have never been put to sleep in my life and it was definitely an experience. I'm glad that everything went well and I didn't have any bad side effects....sore throat or vomiting afterwards. The only thing is, I was rambling about the stupidest things before I went out, i.e. BP oil spill, not drinking alcohol in 3 years....I could tell I was making a fool of myself so I finally just stopped talking mid sentence. LOL

After I came too in recovery, my doctor gave me some photos from the procedure and said here you can post these on facebook. DH said I said all loud "I don't have that crap!" There goes my nice quiet girl image!!! Nothing against people who have myspace or facebook cause I used to have one.

Don't know if I told ya'll or not but he tested my Thyroid and he thinks I'm borderline so he started me on a "baby dose" of synthroid (sp). He said that after the pregnancy if I want, I can stop taking it as long as I get tested every year.

UPDATE: Just got off the phone with my doctor. He said that what he biopsied was more than likely inflammation from the BCP I'm on. But just to make sure he sent it off and will have the results next week.

Hysteroscopy is Wednesday

I have the hysteroscopy Wednesday. If that could just come and go I think I will be alright. I have been pretty good about not worrying but now that it's getting closer I find my self getting worked up over it.

I hate how I completely freak out over the smallest thing, then once it's over I'm like that was nothing. I pray I will be able to say the same for this.

Once we have the Hysteroscopy we will set up a teaching session for IVF. After that it isn't long and I will be done with the BCP.

How do the stims work? Do you start them on or around CD3 like you would clomid? Or after AF is over?

DH and I came to a decision...

Friday was CD1 him and i had been discussing what we wanted to do about another IUI or start IVF. I couldn't come to peace about either of them. So Friday when i was showering i came up with what i felt good about. If i had more cyst and had to start BCP then we would move forward with IVF. If not then we would have our last IUI.

Surprise Surprise two large cyst on my right ovary. I feel good about moving forward with IVF vs IUI. The only thing I'm nervous about is the hysteroscopy (sp). I have never been put to sleep in my life. All I can think about is that tube going down my throat!!!!

Hysteroscopy is where they insert a camera into the cervix to check everything out and make sure that there wont be any problems with the eggs implanting. They could do a saline US where they insert a catheter with a small balloon on the end. My RE said he would rather do the other cause it is more detailed, plus if they were to find anything they can remove it right there.

I know that most people in my shoes would have taken the FREE IUI but I chalk it up to intuition. I have never had a good feeling about IUI's. So moving forward makes me so happy. Especially to think that on Fathers day next year we could either have a little one or have a big belly.

I Love my RE.....

I just got off the phone with my RE. I was asking him what the odds of us getting PG this last IUI since we have already had 2 failed ones. I told him that I didn't wanna waste the time and money if he thought my chances were very low. He said that either one, IVF or IUI isn't out of the ordinary at this point. He did say.........he would do another IUI for FREE!!!!! if that was the route we wanted to take, minus meds of course. If we decide to do this (almost positive we are just need to get DH opinion) and it doesn't work then we will definitely move forward with IVF.

Just wanted to share the good news.

Have a great weekend.

Infertility Sucks

I go tomorrow morning for the beta, even though I know it's a waste of time. I tested Sunday morning and it was a BFN.

Sunday morning in church was terrible. The message however was great and really hit home. He preached on giving your burdens to God. DH and I were both in tears. Even though it was sad I felt a little better after I left. We know we need to give it to him.

My next dilemma is weather or not I wanna go to IVF or another IUI. DH and I said we would only do a max of 3 IUI's. I feel like, well the first two didn't work why would the last one. So why waste that 1,500.00 and another month. I am really torn on what to do. I wanna make the right decision but have no clue which way to go.

I told DH to help me pray about it and hopefully we will both come up with the same answer. He doesn't care which way we go but I think he might be a little nervous about all the procedures of IVF, so maybe right now he is leaning more to IUI.

Any suggestions would be apperciated.

Please pray for Sarah

Please stop by Sarah's page http://ellasmom505.blogspot.com/ She might have her twins this week, at only 25 weeks. She definitely needs our prayers.

Thoughtful Thursday

Romans 4:19-21 Without weakening in his faith, he faced the fact that his body was as good as dead-since he was about a hundred years old-and that Sarah's womb was also dead. Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised.

Abraham looked squarely at the facts yet did not waiver in his view of the future. So many times we either do not face the reality of the situation we are in and go into a blind optimism, or we get so caught up in our current situation that we become a pessimist. But God has the power to deliver us and Abraham stands as a witness on how to believe God in the midst of our life situations.

Dave Whitehead, Senior Pastor, GraceNYC.org

work, wait, work and wait some more

Don't you wish that there was some internal alarm that sounded off when you were pregnant. No having to worry about the TWW, chemical pregnancies or MC. It would just be.

We could go on and quit driving ourselves crazy with every "symptom" in the book. Act like normal sane people and plan for the future.....ahh life would be much easier. Instead we are forced to calculate every move we make and watch everything that goes in our mouth because we "might" be pregnant.

I have been praying lately for us to be blessed with a pregnancy or for Him to take the desire away from us. Adoption is something that is in the back of our minds right now but I don't pray specifically that way yet. We will cross that bridge when we get there.